toshio:

everyone at tumblr on december 16, 11:59 PM right before staff bans titties for eternity:

otherwindow:

Venom, after watching Sailor Moon transform: Eddie
Eddie: Don’t

cancerianfactsdaily:

sometimes the stupid bitch in your life is you and thats all cool

edukaition:

dreamadove:

I want to be politically informed and educated but I also wanna have a good day and be in a good mood. Do you see my problem?

#2018mood

fullmetalheadass:

cudigambino:

I love tumblr. Why? Because I can be horny or depressed in peace.

and everyone else scroll by like “shit me too”

thranduilland:

whateverhumans:

siesiegirl:

professorsparklepants:

tuesdayisfordancing:

ozymandias271:

“our teeth and ambitions are bared” is a zeugma

and it’s a zeugma where one of the words is literal and one is metaphorical which is the BEST KIND

I didn’t know about zeugmas until just now! That is so awesome, everybody: 

zeug·ma ˈzo͞oɡmə/

noun

1. a figure of speech in which a word applies to two others in different senses (e.g.,John and his license expired last week ) or to two others of which it semantically suits only one (e.g., with weeping eyes and hearts ).

ISN’T THAT AWESOME??

#in english class in high school my teacher had us write our own zeugmas in class#and one guy came up with ‘he fell from her favor… and the window’#i am forever looking for opportunities to use that one

She dropped her dress and inhibitions at the door.

What’s this? My favorite rhetorical device showing up on my dashboard?

IT HAS A NAMEEEE!! OH MY GOD!!!

incorrect-1d:

Happy 8 years of One Direction

These five boys are the absolute bane of my life, but I wouldn’t be here without them.

Thank you, @onedirection

almondkittie:

almondkittie:

Imagine being mad at women for being nice to each other and tweeting about it:

Then imagine that tweet backfiring! Lmbo

The entire thread is filled with women complimenting each other. I loved it! ☺️☺️

thesymbolofpeace:

thesymbolofpeace:

IS CUM HALAL?